Tuesday, May 6, 2014

A GRIM FAIRY TALE

Once upon a time there was this Grrreat Biiiig Corporation that had subsidiaries all over the world.  It was a very proud company and one that for the most part was held in very high esteem by peoples every where.  It manufactured all kinds of things and it's products were of the highest class.  It also employed over 200,000 people which is a lot of people and most in high paying jobs.

The company had been around for years and had subsidiaries that had been in many, many countries for many, many years as well. Some had been there for so long that they were considered to be local companies.  The company had been founded and still had its headquarters in the United States but over the years more and more of its earnings came from those many, many subsidiaries in other countries.

Now America is a wonderful country--many Americans believe it to be the greatest nation the world has ever seen--but even those Americans know that in this modern world, America has the stupidest tax laws on the planet.  Among other things, America is the only country that taxes its corporations on a world-wide basis which means that if you earn money in another country, have it taxed there, and bring the remaining profit back to America it is taxed once again at the highest tax rate in the world after a credit for the foreign taxes that had been paid.

Now our Great Big Corporation had been operating in many different countries and had made a real lot of money, but because of the tax laws it couldn't bring any of these profits back home.  What to do?  Oh, what a problem until a really smart guy called a lawyer said to them, "Why don't you use this money where it was earned?  I bet you could expand your business and perhaps even buy a local company which would provide "synergies" as the B-School boys call it."  What a wonderful idea!  And the company looked and looked and behold!  They found the perfect partner who quickly agreed to a very generous offer and the merger was on!  Except…

"Mais NON" said the wicked M. Le Presidant of the country which had been an ally of America for about 250 years.  "Zis would be breach in Le Securite Nacionale…" despite the fact that the technology of the American was just as good if not better.  "Zis too would be an insult to out partners in ze EU (with whom we have never agreed on anything).  I have a far better idea.  We shall merge our company with a competitor from Allemagne, thereby reducing competition in ze EU and making our company Allemagne (who have kicked our ass in every war fought over the last 150 years)!"   Then again, little children, everyone else has as well.

Will there be a happy ending?  Remember, children this is a GRIM fairy tale.  Maybe there will be one but we just don't know.  You will have to keep reading to find out.

Nite, Nite.






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